Stuff

It has been a long time since I wrote anything. We have had a busy month but then every month is fairly busy. Memorial day weekend has past and we are moving into summer.

Last week we, the Abundant Life, finally purchased a video projector. Rebekah worked on putting together everything for Sunday's service, lyrics for the songs, sermon notes and announcements until 11:00 on Saturday night. Sunday morning five minutes into Sunday the power went out. It turns out it only went out at the church. Some how the coupling for the power line which runs across the street and into the building became disconnected. One of the power lines had fallen lower than it was supposed and it pulled the coupling apart. The village utility folks got to it pretty quickly especially since it was a Sunday and Memorial day weekend. I called one of the village board and then left a message with another person and two hours later they were there. It only took 20 minutes to fix the problem and at about noon the power was back on. Of course we ended up having service without power and in 90 degree weather no air conditioning. But no one complained and we had a good time of worship. We sang a couple of hymns I preached a shortened message and we celebrated communion. We were done by 11:30.

Sunday afternoon after Elijah's baseball practice we went to Decatur. In the evening I replaced the brake pads on the minivan. It only took me an hour and a half! I was proud of myself wasn't tempted to curse at any point in the process and since I already knew how to do it I actually kind of enjoyed it. I saved myself a lot of money in the process.

Monday morning I spoke at the Memorial observance that American Legion has every year. It is always across the street from the church in the cemetery. Last year it was inside the church because of rain. It was hot and I was standing in the sun! Sweat poured off of me. I didn't feel like I really connected with the crowd. There were at least 200 people there. But many people came and talked about how they appreciated it. I included the gospel and hopefully planted seeds.

Looking forward to our friends the Overturfs coming on Sunday morning. They will be returning to Africa as missionaries soon.

Create the Future

I read a quote by Dr. Mark Chironna, "we wither repeat the past or create the future." Mark Batterson calls that the difference between ministry out of memory and ministry out of imagination. We are at a place where I feel a definite tension between the status quo and what can be. I am not willing to continue with the status quo. Not because I want change for change sake. If I wanted that I would just find a new ministry position. (Not that it hasn't crossed my mind.) But we need to change because not enough people are becoming disciples. There are too many unchurched and dechurched folks in Moultrie County and we are not reaching them effectively. My real in particular is to reach families in my generation.

We want to see whole families serving the Lord. I want to teach and disciple parents so that they can pass a living faith down to their children who will own that faith as their own. I believe that our church can transform the culture of our county. I believe that is why Abundant Life is here. But we will not be able to do it unless we are willing to take risks and find effective ways of reaching outside of our walls to engage people.

I really believe that we as disciples are called to bring the gospel to people. As we interact with people in the marketplace, in the workplace, in the schools, in the highways and byways of life we allow the Holy Spirit to interact with them through our words and maybe even more importantly through our actions. To do this we must change the way we are doing things or we will continue to repeat the past.

Stumbling Stones

Romans 9:32b, 33
They stumbled over the "stumbling stone." 33As it is written: "See, I lay in Zion a stone that causes men to stumble and a rock that makes them fall, and the one who trusts in him will never be put to shame."

I was reading through Romans 9 during my devotion time today. This verse jumped out at me. The Jews of Paul's day couldn't past the fact that they could not earn salvation through observing the law. They stumbled over the stumbling stone.

All of us have met people who for one reason or another won't surrender to Christ Jesus as their savior. Some won't admit that they've sinned. Others want to earn salvation. Some people wonder why God allows bad things to happen. Other folks can't believe that Jesus is the only name that can save us. They think that all religions should lead to God and can't get past the exclusivity of Christ. Some folks get hung up on all the hypocrites in church. The list is long and varied but at some point every person who hears the gospel has to make a decision. Accept Christ or not. Those who trust in Him are saved. Those that don't stumble. And scripture says that the cornerstone will then crush them.

So the stumbling stone is always Christ. What are some of the "stumbling stones" you have encountered?

Easter

Easter has come and gone again. Man we have too much sugar in our house. Especially at a time when I am needing to lose weight. I guess I will have to step up the exercise regimen. We had a good Sunday. I preached at the community sunrise service. There was a pretty good turnout. I didn't hear what the final count was but I always enjoy preaching at community events. There is a different dynamic.

I led worship and preached in our service. It went pretty well. I was concerned because I knew that several people would be traveling and so I wasn't sure what our attendance would be like. However we ended up having 25% more people than our average so I was pleasantly surprised. I still am missing the upper range of my singing voice but I really was surprised that I felt so well after the service and still had a good amount of energy.

This afternoon our state Representative stopped by my office. He is running for a second term. During the last campaign I sent him an e-mail. I had been planning on voting for him because even though he is a democrat he is pretty conservative and has a lot of experience. But he ran some negative advertisements that I thought were misleading and made fun of the republican candidate. So I sent an e-mail letting him know why I wasn't voting for him. I didn't get a reply right away. But he said that when he was driving past today he saw my name on the sign and remembered the e-mail which he had saved. He told me about some of the things that he regretted from the campaign which was his first for a state level office. He also said that he had talked to other candidate since then and explained things to him. I thought it was a pretty honest answer to get from a politician and was impressed with his integrity.

A good wife!

Proverbs 18:22 He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD.

It is amazing how God has blessed me with Rebekah. These last couple of months would have been really dark without her. I wouldn't want to be sick for this long ever again but we have certainly grown so much closer during this time. We have spent more time together because I have been limited in how much I get out and we haven't gotten sick of each other. In fact we have had a lot of fun together. I am certainly looking forward to our golden years when it's just the two of us. We will definitely enjoy these years of raising our kids together but we won't be like some couples who don't know what to do when the kids are gone. We definitely know what to do!

Rebekah has grown these last months. She is becoming such a wonderful Godly woman. I am excited to see who she is and who she is becoming. I love her because she is my best friend, I love her because we have sparks and I love her because of who she is in Christ. We like to say that we are addicted to each other. It's true!

Ouch!

First the good news! Yesterday I went back to the doctor to get the results of the biopsy. No cancer! It's really wierd to have to write that. The past three weeks have been crazy but God has been good! But to wonder if you might have cancer is disconcerting at best. So I will have another CT scan in six weeks to make sure whatever was in my chest is completely gone by then.

After seeing the pulmonary specialist I went to my regular doctor. He was convinced that I had cancer. He hadn't received a report from the biopsy yet. He was happy but was almost in disbelief.

I have this wart on my index finger. I have been using over the counter stuff on it for quite sometime. But every time I put the acid on it, it would break open and bleed. Then I would have to put triple antibiotic on it and let the skin heal. The thing would grow bigger. So I told the doctor and he sprayed liquid nitrogen on it. And then he did it again and again and again. OUCH! I don't remember the last time I experienced such pain. And it is still throbbing today. The pain is bad enough that Dr. prescribed a narcotic pain reliever. So here's hoping it falls off.
(Wasn't that way more than you wanted to know about me?)

Sometimes we have to experience pain to get the results we want.

A good day!

The doctor came in after the biopsy and said that there are no tumors. I am a little fuzzy on details but basically it seems that the mass in my chest is a swollen lymph node or gland and was a pocket of infection from all the sickness I have had in my lungs. It has been a long time since I have felt that much relief. Tears welled in my eyes. God is so good! So many people have said that they felt peace this weekend when they were praying. One person even told my sister, " I am telling you right now there is no tumor."

We know God has walked with us through this. I am not completely well yet but feel that I am on the road. I woke up this morning with the beginnings of a head cold so keep praying for that. I will be preaching on Sunday morning as long as the Lord wills. Next week we will go back to the doctor to find out about the biopsy of the lymph node which the doctor is confident will show nothing but infection. Then I will see my other doctor about my heart rate which I am still taking medicine for. But all in all yesterday was a great day! God is good!

Here we go!

I haven't eaten since 11:30 last night. So I'm ready to go have something stuck down my throat. I have been waiting a week so I guess it's about time. But somehow it just seems not quite real. Thanks to all for praying for me. I have peace in my heart and I am really just wanting to preach on Sunday and get back to "normal." But I will wait on God's timing. We really have wonderful people in our church who have been so patient with me and who really just want me to be well again. They are even bringing meals starting tonight although I'm not sure I will be in the mood to swallow much. Thanks to everyone for calls and e-mails.

Suffering

Before I got sick I posted about what God was saying to me through Romans 5:1-5. I skipped through the passage and picked out the word character. I even mentioned it in a sermon. The last several years when we have been about to go through a tough time God has given me a scripture verse to hold onto. This has been no exception. I went back and read this passage in Romans again. Here it is in case you are like me and will forget to look it up.

1Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, 2through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. 3Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

The portion in bold is the portion I skipped over to a degree. My thought at the time was, "well I haven't really suffered much but suffering is relative." I thought the key was learning perseverance so that God could work on developing a more Christlike character in me. I still believe that is what He is doing only I don't get to skip any of the hard parts.

As I was praying about that yesterday I wondered why God would be so concerned with my character if (and this is worst case, I was just thinking not borrowing trouble) I wasn't going to live long. It is a morbid thought but don't get caught up on it. I really felt that if God is working in this situation, and we know He is, and if God is producing a more Christlike character in me, and I believe that is what He is doing, (there's a whole Romans 8:28 thing) then I have unfinished work to do for the kingdom. As I was thinking that thought I heard that voice, the Holy Spirit, ( I haven't heard much of it lately so it was wonderful) say two words. I was thinking about the fact that God must not be finished with me if He would be working in this situation to produce character in me, the two words I heard in my Spirit were, that's hope! I have this hope in my heart. Hope is a powerful thing. And let me remind you of Romans 5:5 again " And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us."

Home

It's so nice to be home. I don't have pneumonia. However I have a mass in my chest that is wrapped around a bronchial tube. That is why it has been hard to breathe at time and it is why I have tightness and pain in my chest. I will have a biopsy on Wednesday. All I can do is pray until then. It is hard not to imagine the worst. It is hard not to give way to fear.

As I was praying and spending time with God today I continued to seek Him for what He is trying to teach me through this experience. I have no real definitive answer. But (and I am not trying to sound super spiritual here) I have come to a determination. A long time ago I decided to follow Jesus. And I am going to continue to do so no matter what. There is an old song that says the same thing. As one of the verses says, "Take this whole world but give me Jesus." That's my prayer for right now.

Thank you for all who are praying!

Divided Heart?

Psalm 86:11

Teach me your way, O LORD,
and I will walk in your truth;
give me an undivided heart,
that I may fear your name.

This was a part of my devotions today. In my long battle with this sickness I have in some ways developed a divided heart. A lot of things can divide our heart but once again, (I think we need to continually relearn this lesson sometimes), I am learning to be whole hearted. What I mean is that my priority must be seeking the Lord with my whole heart. Nothing else can take the top priority. Some of the things in my life that divide my heart are family, financial concern, wanting our church to grow, and wanting to be healthy again. Obviously these are all legitimate but when I pursue God with my whole heart they will fall into place. Two promises Jeremiah 29:13 "You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." And Matthew 6:33,34 "
But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

Health wise I am not feeling better but I have determined to work at least two hours a day no matter what. I hope that by doing I will regain my endurance and strength and I may begin to feel better. Thursday is my next chest x-ray. I have visitor letters to get sent out and follow up to coordinate. We had several visitors Sunday which doesn't happen often for us. One of my goals is to have visitors every week or at least several times a month.

We are also expecting snow tonight. At least I have an excuse not to shovel. My grandma already told me not to "be out shoveling snow with that pneumonia." Besides it should be in the fifties by Friday and it will all melt anyway.

Sunday

We had a nice time visiting with some new friends this morning. They are a newly married couple who are preparing to go to northern Africa to teach English in a Muslim nation. This country has been much in the news as a civil war has claimed thousands of lives. The government has covertly supported genocide. They will need God's grace and protection as they begin their married lives together. What an adventure! Of course we need to remember that any time we will follow God it should be an adventure. I think we too often make life boring.

I am tired. I am tired of a lot of things especially of being sick. I had a chest x-ray on Wednesday. My right lung is basically clear. I have pneumonia in my left lung now. I finished round four of anti-biotic today. I am also taking a powerful steroid for my lungs. I wish I could say I knew it was working but the last two days I have felt weaker and coughed more. It is not over yet but I know I will get better eventually. I hope to be able to preach without coughing by Easter. Thanks for praying for me.

Pneumonia

So I am recovering from pneumonia which followed bronchitis which was preceded by a sinus infection. I have been on antibiotics for 25 of the last 40 days. I am feeling better though I still don't have a lot of stamina. I can go for a few hours but then I hit a wall. I am preaching Sunday and since my alternate worship leader will be out of town I am going to lead worship. I think I can do it without coughing too much. I miss being able to sing. I also miss preaching without worrying about my breathing. I am excited about going to see Jeremy Camp next Tuesday in concert. That should be fun. It will test my endurance. I was talking to my friend Rich today. Rich has been sick but not as sick as I have been. He's a children's pastor and an energy guy but he's been losing his voice when gets too excited. He has tickets for the big ten tournament tomorrow in Indianapolis. He mentioned the same worry whether or not he had enough stamina to make the drive and watch all four games. I covet your prayers.

The hardest thing about the last six weeks (and these have been basically six of the hardest weeks of my life) is that I have struggled to study the Bible and pray consistently. The energy and drive to pursue has been missing. When I am sick I find it hard to really come into the presence of God although that is what I crave and need. I was talking to my friend BG yesterday and he said the same thing. When he is sick is when he really needs to press in to God the most but it seems we do it the least. I don't know maybe you are one of those who pray without ceasing when you are sick. This has really been a discouraging wilderness time. But I know that at the end I will find God and find that I have been made stronger in some way through Him.

Have you ever really craved being in the presence of God? I know I have and do right now. I have some thoughts on His presence that I hope to post in the next few days.

Discipline

I just finished my second round of anti-biotics. After not going to the doctor in about nine years I have now made two trips in the last month. I have been coughing now for six weeks. I beginning to feel like the passage in Hebrews 12:7-11 is referring to me.

7As you endure this divine discipline, remember that God is treating you as his own children. Whoever heard of a child who was never disciplined? 8If God doesn't discipline you as he does all of his children, it means that you are illegitimate and are not really his children after all. 9Since we respect our earthly fathers who disciplined us, should we not all the more cheerfully submit to the discipline of our heavenly Father and live forever[a]?

10For our earthly fathers disciplined us for a few years, doing the best they knew how. But God's discipline is always right and good for us because it means we will share in his holiness. 11No discipline is enjoyable while it is happening--it is painful! But afterward there will be a quiet harvest of right living for those who are trained in this way.

Have you ever felt this way? Anyway I'm back on the horse and trying to knock out some work I am behind on. My brother is moving from Seattle to Cahokia, Illinois so Friday I will go and help unload. I am hoping that I can breath. Last night they stopped in Rapid City, SD on their trek across the country with a four year old and a little dog. I am trying to get back in the swing of things. Have a great day!

Creativity on a Budget

One of the things God is challenging me to do is to be more creative in ministry. Creativity is never easy even when you have a large budget. When you don't have a lot of financial resources it gets even tougher. But it is not impossible. Nor is being a small church an excuse for mediocrity. I think a lot of churches stay small on purpose. One of the reasons is that it allows them to avoid increasing expectations. The way it's always been is good enough. Just like the hymn "it was good enough for (fill in the blank) and it's good enough for me." I hate that song but that's another topic entirely. I have had a lot of ideas that had to be set aside for the time being or adapted because of lack of resources. That's frustrating. But it is also a challenge to be embraced.

Jane is our children's church and Sunday school coordinator. She is wonderfully creative. She often writes her own programs, improvises her own craft ideas and object lessons and stretches every dollar. She does a great job! It may not be as slick as a large church but in my experience our kids are learning and growing and they seem to have fun. So small church pastors don't let the size of your budget discourage you from being creative. Accept the challenge. I may have to be even more creative than other pastors who have more resources but I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. I am always looking for creative ideas if you have any to share.

Random Friday thoughts

Here is a pretty good article on preaching by Rick Warren. http://www.pastors.com/RWMT/default.asp?id=246&artid=4552&expand=1

I'm still learning how to do this blog thing. At some point I'm sure I will be able to make my links look prettier. Today is my official day off. We will go to Decatur and do our shopping. It should be a very relaxing day but it often depends on the mood of the kids. I'm trying to be more relaxed when do the shopping but most of the time I don't enjoy the actual shopping part. Usually like I said it depends on who is misbehaving and who is behaving well.

One of the challenges I have had is my schedule. I really set my own to such an extent that I have almost too much flexibility. I am not a rigid guy but I am trying to get into a routine. After four years here you would think I would have one but we have had two more kids since we've been here and the different stages of their lives have meant different things to my schedule. One of the things I have asked other pastors is how they spend their time. They all have different answers. Feel free to share your thoughts if you have any. My time demands are in the evenings generally. As long as I show up and preach on Sundays and make an appearance on Wednesday evenings most of our people don't really care what I do during the week. The office isn't a bustling place in our small church. Most of our ministry things happen outside of it. So I am still experimenting with the best way to do things. That's one of the blessings of this church. They allow me room to experiment.

Theology of the open door

I am sure that you have heard people who determine what God's will for their life is by which doors open for them. If it's and open door they feel like they must go through it because obviously it is God's will for their life. They may even quote scripture like Revelation 3:7
"These are the words of him who is holy and true, who holds the key of David. What he opens no one can shut, and what he shuts no one can open." To quote this about God's will for your life is a prime example of proof texting without context. And context is very important in determining the will of God. The reason some folks live such erratic life is that they go through every open door. To use another cliche though I think instead of looking for open doors we should determine that in the words of the old hymn, "where He leads I'll follow."

I can't be real specific in my example although I am experiencing it at the moment because if you don't want everyone to know everything you can't really say it on a blog. But there is situation where I have told my wife several times, "if that door ever opens I will go through and see what happens." Well the door opened recently and even though it has been on my mind a lot lately I am pretty sure that God doesn't want me to go through that particular door. I am not sure that I am doing anything more than rambling here but I will try to sum this up to make my point. Instead of trying every door and going through the one that is open I need to remember what God has said to me in the past and unless He has said something different I should just go with the last thing I heard from Him on the subject.

That open door is tempting but if I allow it to distract me then I could lose sight of where I am going. Don't just look for vague omens and signs, really seek to know God's will for your life. And then don't settle for anything less.

Who is the greatest?

Today I was reading Mark chapter nine. In this chapter the disciples are having a debate about who is the greatest amongst them. They are ashamed to tell Jesus what they were arguing about and rightly so, it was an argument born of the fleshly nature of young men who are naturally competitive. Human nature assumes that some are better than others. I was reminded though of the debates raging through the blogosphere and the evangelical church in America. These debates include cessationism versus continuism and emerging church versus the modern church versus seeker sensitive. It seems to me that each thinks the other is wrong and our way is better. (Now I don’t stand for false doctrine and I will speak out against it.) But so much of the debate really isn’t about someone being a false teacher even though that is the stated reason for some of the disagreements.

The next part of Mark 9 really reminds me of much of what I have heard and read from both sides of each position. “38“Teacher,” said John, “we saw a man driving out demons in your name and we told him to stop, because he was not one of us.”
39“Do not stop him,” Jesus said. “No one who does a miracle in my name can in the next moment say anything bad about me, 40for whoever is not against us is for us. 41I tell you the truth, anyone who gives you a cup of water in my name because you belong to Christ will certainly not lose his reward.”
It is important to know and be able to explain what you believe. It is important to stand up for that and not to compromise for the sake of compromise. But what really matters is that the gospel is preached and that people understand how to be saved. Until they accept the message we cannot make them disciples anyway. Paul wrote in Philippians 1:18 “But what does it matter? The important thing is that in every way, whether from false motives or true, Christ is preached. And because of this I rejoice.”
As I read recently from Mark Batterson, (and this is a paraphrase), heaven is a big party and God wants as many people to come to the party as will accept the invitation on His terms. Although I will very much disagree with some of my brothers in the faith, ultimately whether we are Calvinists or Armenians (sp?) doesn’t matter what counts is that we are of like precious faith. That is how I can sit down tomorrow with my fellow pastors in town from the Cumberland Presbyterians (although he came out of an AG church), Free Methodist, Untied Methodist and Disciples of Christ and know that we are all brothers in Christ.

Valentine's Day

I didn't do much work today although the day is not yet done. This morning I took my six year old daughter Kaitlyn out for breakfast. I realized that this is the first time we have really gone some place by ourselves, just the two of us. It is an oversight I am aiming to set right. As a father of a daughter I think it is part of my job to build the self-image of my little girl so that when she becomes a woman she will have a healthy view of herself. I know I will not be perfect but it is important that when she looks to begin dating and eventually to marry, she doesn't need to make up for what I have failed to give her. If I do my job she will expect to be treated a certain way. If I am successful she will not fall prey to some poser of a man who doesn't treat the way a woman created in the image of God should be treated. Kaitlyn is full of life and fire and spirit. I expect that as intentionally build her up she will kick any joker to the curb who treats her as an object or as a lesser person. She will know that she is special and beautiful and important to me and to God. She will know because I will tell her and I will demonstrate it with my actions.

I also took my lovely wife out for valentine's day. We went to lunch because I have youth in a couple of hours. I told my other youth leader to take the night off and take his wife out for dinner because tonight is her night off of work. I hope he does it. Anyway Rebekah and I had a great time. We went on our first date eleven years ago. In July we will celebrate ten years of marriage. It just keeps getting better...

Hope

James 1:16-18 says, “Don’t be deceived, my dear brothers. Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. He chose to give us birth through the word of truth, that we might be a kind of firstfruits of all he created.”
One of Satan’s favorite tactics with us as believers is to get us to question the goodness of God. When we go through hard times in our lives we are tempted to think that God is doing this to us. When a loved on dies often I hear a person say that God took my husband, wife or child. When an accident happens often we ask why God would allow it to happen. When we fail we are tempted to question whether or not God cares or if He is good. In the midst of a natural disaster such as hurricane Katrina many people blame God for what happens. When life doesn’t turn out the way we want it to Satan will try to get you to cast blame upon God or to question God’s compassion.
The real target is your belief in the goodness of God. If Satan can get you to question even for a brief time the absolute goodness of God, then the enemy has a golden opportunity to deceive you. James tells us that one of the ways that we are deceived is when we question the goodness of God. If you want to maintain hope in the midst of disaster in your life you must come to place where your belief that God is always good is fixed and determined in your life. In the Psalms David makes it clear that we have no good thing apart from God (Psalm 16:2). Understand that the good things in your life are from God. The bad things are a result of sin, whether yours or someone else’s or whether or not it is deliberate always remember that God is good all the time.
Our faith rests upon the goodness of God. If Satan can get you to question that then Satan can get you to question your faith in a God who is less than good. Don’t be deceived by disappointment. Settle in your heart now that God is good and then praise Him for His goodness and His grace and mercy. If you can persevere through the pain and disappointment then God will develop character in your life. One of the by-products of character is hope. We have this promise in Romans 5:1-5 Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.